Here's the thing about moles. They're ugly. They're unsightly. They're flaws in their owners biological makeup.
So riddle me this... how is it that some of the most beautiful women from back in the day sported these imperfections in the most obvious of places - their faces - and actually made them look good?
Like really good. It's just plain annoying is what it is.
When I think of moles, I think...
I myself have my own stylin' mole. It sits on my chest, a little off center, to the left a smidge. I tell people it's my Cindy Crawford mole... just that it melted one hot summers day and slipped down a little.
Speaking of Cindy Crawford, let's get this show on the road with quite possibly the highest earning mole of the '80s & '90s...
Urggh! Cindy Crawford's face is so utterly irritating to look at. It's literally perfect! It's as if God gave her this immense beauty but also slapped a small imperfection on her face before sending her to Earth. He/She was just trying to keep all things equal, but what He/She didn't count on was that Cindy Crawford's mole would become her trademark, her unique selling point (USP), her one-way ticket to gazillions of wigwams.
I read once, that when she was quite young, Cindy C entertained the idea of removing her mole. Can you even imagine a world in which Cindy Crawford has a mole-free face? I'm trying hard, but I'm just not seeing it. It would be like if Jennifer Grey changed her nose! That would really be quite sil... oh wait... hmm.
Seriously! What are the chances of another supermodel popping up out of nowhere, in the early '90s, sporting a mole in exactly the same place as Cindy Crawford?
Niki Taylor is living proof that imperfections can sometimes work in your favour... as long as every other part of you is perfect beyond belief, as is the case with all these beautiful mole-slapped ladies.
Oh come ON! It was hard enough believing one girl with a dirty great mole above her lip could make it big in the modelling world, let alone two of them. But THREE?! And all, more or less, in exactly the same spot? Come on!... throw us mere mortals a frigging bone here!
Shana Zadrick didn't quite make it to the heights of her lip-mole comrades Cindy & Niki, but she walked for all the major designers, featured in George Michael's 'Too Funky' music video, and was a saucy Guess girl to boot! So, you know, she did all right for herself.
I do believe Milla Jovovich has had her forehead mole removed. Either that or she covers it well with makeup these days. It's one of the more obscure places for a facial beauty mole, but given she became a very successful model & actress, I don't think it's hurt her career too much. Ok ok, it didn't hurt her career at all.
Sherilyn Fenn was so glamorous. So very very glamorous. With a sweet little mole that sat perfectly below her eyebrow - drawing even more attention to her perfect eyes - she was always impeccably made up & dressed to impress. She carried herself with an air of mystery & intrigue, and was one of the main draw cards of Twin Peaks. Perfectly cast as Audrey Horne, I tip my hat to David Lynch.
I keep forgetting how big Paula Abdul was in the '80s & '90s. Her album 'Forever Your Girl' was huge! And she was something of a style icon for a wee while there. Anyone who gets to smooch around with Keanu Reeves ('90s Keanu Reeves no less) in a music video (Rush Rush | 1991) earns themselves some serious respect points. I'm pretty sure she inspired quite a few fake beauty moles to the cheek back in the day.
Lisa Stansfield sure knew how to style it up with her glamorous look. Her cheekbone mole, and a few curls of hair stuck into place on her face with gel, was her signature look. All in all it was a really classy look too.
Aussie model Francoise Skeates won the double beautimole jackpot with a Cindy C upper lip mole, and a Lisa Stansfield cheekbone mole, plus a few other teensy weensy little mini-moles dotted around the place, I mean face. Talk about over-achieving!
A popular model for teen and young women's fashion magazines in the '80s & early '90s, Francoise wore her moles well. Very well in fact. Some of her fashion editorials are absolutely smokin'! Keep an eye out for a couple of them in the coming months.
All in all it's enough to wish your face was covered in the damn things. Turns out moles can be highly profitable - on the right faces.
I'll bookend this post the only way I know how...